The Goods from Santa Fe

I have to confess, after the third day of shopping I had a mini meltdown. This is the time of life when I feel I want to give things away, simplify, you know the knda attitude that " less is more". SO WHY AM I BUYING ALL THIS STUFF? I continued to toss and turn all night wrestling with myself....my gut said " what the hell are you doing?", my mind said " remember this is a gift for your children and has value in many ways" and my emotions said " we are entering lent and it's all DUST TO DUST"...then this deeper voice of spirit said " Why are you fighting this? Remember you are exactly where you are supposed to be, let go of the fear, this is God's house, it all belongs to him, trust where I am leading you, enjoy the fruits of your labor, be still and know I am God, what's the BIG DEAL?"...God has a sense of humor, you know...and besides, the dream I had just the night before was reassuring.

I dreamt that I returned to OMESA after being gone for awhile, it was quiet, peaceful. I noticed the apple tree was huge, really really BIG with branches full of apples, so many the limbs were heavy, apples of all sizes and so many I couldn't imagine how I could pick them all. My thoughts went to " Where am I going to get all the containers to put all this fruit so I can begin giving it all away."

Lent has begun now, things don't seem to matter much these days but I continue to make decisions about hardware, pool design, the type materials we will use for the driveway, where the barn will be placed, how the firepit stone will be stacked, where the chaise lounges will be place so the stones will be set in the correct place poolside, how the furniture will be best arranged for conversation, ....in all this while I just want to be quiet and as I remember how my Mom and I gave everything away when my Dad died. I guess I am still wrestling with having one foot in this world and one in the eternal. Do we ever understand? So I count my blessings and all the apples from the tree of life, still looking for the containers to give them all away...they aren't mine, remember....thank you GOD for the fruits I can share and for the humble reminder that things are only gifts when they are shared, given in love.

I look forward to what you, my dear God, has in store ....he sure knows what he's doing and I know I don't! following along....